Searching for "lack of communication"

4 Results For 'lack of communication'

Nate

May 02, 2024 @ (United States)

Tags: B

27M have been in a relationship with 27F for a year and half now. Earlier this year I was going through a rough time, had to put my cat down and was also needing to find a job and was really struggling with my mental health. I feel as if I put too much pressure on my girlfriend to be overly supportive but at the same time I never really communicated what I needed from her. While I wish that I told her that I needed space to figure these things out, I instead told her I wasn't feeling the relationship anymore.

With our lack of communication in the relationship, we never really ended the relationship and instead went a month and a half with just texting each other and met up once or twice. I did eventually find a job, and decided to work on myself a bit more. Part of this was meeting up with my girlfriend and spilling my feelings about how i'd like to continue to work on this relationship. We agreed to continue dating, but after just one time hanging out (1 week) she told me that she wanted a break with no contact.

I respected that and we went on a break for about a 3 weeks before I eventually reached out asking where she was at with it all. She called me up, and I explained to her how I've been working on myself through therapy and hobbies, but am still wanting to work on the relationship because I knew I could be a better partner. She told me that when we hung out last she couldn't get the thought that I didn't care about her out of her head. She said that she was happy to see my working on myself but it seemed like a punch in the face that I was doing it now, and if we were to stay and work on things then these thoughts of the past me would still bother her.

I kind of assumed this was going to be where her head was at, but she mentioned that she could feel differently about it all in a couple weeks or a month. She just didn't want to drag me along, which is hard because i'm optimistic things could work. We ended the call, but never really came to a conclusion as to what we were doing. So I called her back and asked, what are we right now. Is this still a break or are we broken up? She responded with broken up. This confuses me because I asked her earlier why she hadn't broken up with me yet, and her response was that she loved me and cared for me.

Why is it that I had to almost force her to give me an answer on this? I'm not sure if I should be waiting for her to change her mind or if I should use this phone call as closure to the end of the relationship.

Sophia Styles

November 03, 2016 @ (San Antonio)

Tags: Dishonesty, lack of communication, fear of commitment

I met him at a party in December 2015. It was obvious that we were both attracted to each other and we started dating straight away. On our first date he tells me he loves me, that freaked me out and I saw it as a red flag, but decided to dodge the bullet to give him a chance. Being with him was amazing since I loved spending time with him, but we barely ever saw each other. We only saw each other twice a month for 1 hour or 2. I wanted to see him more than that since we only lived 30 mins apart. I told him that, but it never happened.

Last month he broke up with me because his feelings weren't as strong as mine and his feelings were diminishing. He never communicated this to me at the time and instead he repressed this since he wanted to still be with me, so he pretended like everything was ok and was telling me how he loves me and misses me when he wasn't feeling it. That made me feel like the past few months was all a farce and was leading me on. The fact that he wasn't honest with me is what hurts the most.

A few months later he still wants me around since he is inviting me to events, so I am left being really confused.

Jennifer

January 31, 2013 @ (United States)

Tags: (gay, boyfriend, bestfriend, mutual)

My name is Jennifer and I am 18 years old. About a year a go, my best friend of 2 years finally asked me out and I couldn't have been happier. We spend an amazing 9 months together until something happened in November. We were having a bit of a hiccup in our relationship. Just a little lack of communication but nothing big. I told him we needed to talk things out, so we went out for coffee the morning of the 27th.
That's when he dumped me hard, saying that he just didn't like me anymore, and had no feelings for me. It was completely out of the blue. I was distraught for about 2 weeks until he finally told me he was gay. I felt horrible, that I might have done something to cause it, or I made him turn gay. But he assured me that it was always a thought in his head but never wanted to tell me to spare my feelings.
I'll admit- things were awkward for a week or two but then we immediately returned to being best friends, and we were inseparable again. I also started hanging out with our other mutual friend, he was funny and smart and we really got along well.
Well about 2 weeks ago our mutual friend decided to tell me he was gay. I began to panic, thinking that something was up, but my ex was very consoling to say that everything was fine and there was nothing between the two of them- they were just friends and got along well because they had enough in common.
Easy enough right? Well wrong. The mutual friend let the cat out of the bag that he and my ex-boyfriend started dating a month after he dumped me.
So I was not only dumped for someone else, it was for our mutual best friend... who was a guy.
And now I'm not speaking to either of them because I feel betrayed that they would go behind my back like that. I told them everything and they kept that huge secret from me for about 3 months.
Anyone know what to do?
-Jennifer

Jolene

January 02, 2012 @ (Aus)

Tags: 1

We weren't together long, probably only over a month and the relationship felt kind of rushed, as if everything just went way too fast. It isn't as if I regret anything about the relationship as it happened, I just think it would've turned out better if it didn't go so fast.
Anyway, all of a sudden when the holidays began we saw each other less and less. I was told that he was working too much and he was too tired to see me. When I asked about our lack of communication he said that he was just too tired and that I never really talked to him. It was frustrating and despairingly I attempted a sort of silent approach interspersed with periods of strained conversation (not face to face). I have no idea how any of this was supposed to help and so I just left it. He didn't 'have time' to see me...okay, then I'll just go on and assume that he's just not interested anymore.
So basically my breakup was a prolonged period of confusion in which the dumper let me work it out for myself that we were no longer together. Whether this method of indirect break up was an act of cowardice, laziness or (seriously misguided) kindness I don't know. We still talk occasionally through social networks and such and are supposedly 'friends' in a weird way that feels like nothing meaningful. I don't feel any resentment towards him (or try not to) because this stuff happens and people lose interest. Except I hope that when it does happen most people explain this to the persons' face and don't let them painstakingly figure it out for themselves.